"i saw well why the gods do not speek to us openly, nor let us answer. till that word can be dug out of us, why should they hear the babble we think we mean? how can they meet us face to face till we have faces and sincerity in our souls and selves?"
i'll try. i must try, no matter how hard.
o faces! faces! i think it all started out earnestly, but we were weak and inadequate.
what do we really want and mean?
can we really love and live and forgive, granted that we r all in this together and that clichely, no one is perfect? but so? that isnt excuse not to be
BEAUTIFULLY IMPERFECT.
do not question nor criticise me. i have my own plans, my own ideas. i am not out to court your approval either, and trust me there is no strife, for i am indifferent. there is no value in contempt. i am incompetent. as much as you are.
we look with eyes that dont see.
so pot, please stop calling the kettle black.
today is july 5th. in 180 days everything will culminate. it will be new year 2010, a full decade after primary one. how time flies. olevels will be over, prom will be over and we will part. maybe not. who knows?
i have wasted so much time i could cry. what have i really done all these while? nothing? not really. i have accomplished many a milestone, lived many wild days and seen the grandest of sights.
now i am studying, so just to take a respite, i shalll account for what i have done(or not done) since fri night, where it was a nite of jackson songs.
on sat, there was bio. i strode in at 8:30 and proceeded to do the experiment. drafted the beautiful plan waited a while and then left. went first with calise n joe to buy cake for jiahui bday. chunhong followed. anyway, we ate first. joe called for eggs, i called for eggs, and calise called for eggs. seperately. the auntie made so many trips she must have felt like beating us instead of the eggs. so as i sat there sipping my 3 eggs, calise n joe bought a choc and pandan cake.
then we left and most unfortunately, i had to leave for ritz carlton to eat buffet because my aunt just gave birth and we were there to see the baby. or rather see just his legs for he was sleeping and we did not want to disturb him. haha i have a new baby cousin! cant wait to see all of them grow up.
so i ate mainly dessert and then we left, asked my dad to drop me at safra. my gosh, i've been there every other other day.
everyone was there playing pool... nothing much for me, i just played one round with joe. all suck, must be the eggs, we concluded. then we left and they went to darren hse to do pe project while we me n joe went calise hse on the pretext of doing the peproject. of course we watched tv and fell asleep.
but the interesting thing happened after dinner. i stood up and some rice got stuck to my ass. i was wearing dark coloured, so it was quite evident. picture this:
joe spoted the white flecks and proceeded to dust the peripherial rice grains. but there was one stubbon grain right at the epicentre of my ass, so he started chasing after my ass and smacking it. in public. omg. so gay.
he could have told me, and i would remove the rice DISCREETLY. so embarrassing, so i must eat more rice in future to get my revenge, you nasty, sticky little grains.
went home slacked and cant really remember what i did. slept early anyway.
but still woke up at 12 today. did indifference essay, some amaths, geog owed essay. did not do bulk of amaths, emaths. chem seems to b on hold... bio n phy ok...
must sit down and plan l'strategie par excellence pour success.
oh ya, a fleeting though just hit me. adam khoo speaks the truth, but the truth is a gift. his strategies hold true, but how often do they really happen? and when they do, who is to be credited? there is just so much we cannot do. otherwise everyone will be by default smart alexes. if u cant find a way, make one. its the only thing we can and should do. face it, not everyone is born into equal circumstances. and remember that the circumstance makes the man.
how true...
I hereby relinquish my prospect to an olevel chinese A.
and it is all my fault.
